It is so exciting for me to welcome a new GUEST, Lise Storm Karlsen, here into my blog space, a space that I created to share my experience of integration. It brings me such joy to be able to witness others doing as I AM, living their talk and walking their own path. No one can do this job of integrating the Divine in us, balancing the sacred masculine and feminine energies within but us, no one.

Fear lives in the past or the future, protection or projection. The present moment is all that counts, catching how you are feeling as life brings you opportunities, is the transformation that we have all been waiting for. It is right here, right now and many are doing it.

This moment in time on planet Earth is like no other. 2012 is the year of power, a number 5, change! Welcome it, embrace the changes and know that it is a powerful time to be birthing your true SELF into your life. Who knows what comes next? All I know for sure is that with you in it, its going to be fun! Welcome Lise and thank YOU.

“The last days I’ve been aware of a very life-defining aspect lingering… so close, but not yet integrated. I feel its resistance – feel the wave’s of unease flushing through me when I do something to activate this… programming; when I’m not acting/being according to its… rules, requirements, limitations and specifications; when I’m allowing myself to loosen up, letting go of the self-control, opening up in creative, spontaneous, passionate, playful, powerful and rebellious ways (rebelling against these rules…).

I breathed into the feelings more totally than ever this morning – asked this creation of my soul “why are you still resisting?”… and I felt its rigid demands/vows/oaths – made by one of my soul’s life-experiences… probably during the (for this aspect) traumatic “fall” of Atlantis (that is what I feel… but it’s very subtle and vague).

I was actually very excited yesterday – celebrating a huge breakthrough: I worked on our homepage (www.houseofawakening.cc) adding info and pics… publishing all this stuff totally without unease/anxiety. I could not believe it; I just felt immensely proud and happy and relieved… not a drop of fear or doubt at all! That is completely new for me – such unqualified positive feelings for something I created. Actually this also goes for the guests we’ve had here lately; absolutely no stress at all (no feeling of duty and responsibility – no pressure on myself at all… to be pleasing etc.)!

But the unease came back yesterday evening – not because of the homepage-creation or guest, but because of a silly, unimportant comment I made in a small-talk-thread on FB; just meaningless words having fun – and the feeling was back. At first I was very disappointed – I really thought that this aspect was neutralized now, that it had surrendered, that this programming was deleted, that this limitation in me was gone – integrated and healed… but nope – still there. So, it was a good thing I made that stupid comment; I want to finish this now – eat the whole elephant! I took a deep breath and said “hello, you!” And breathed some more – before sleep (the last though being “it ends here and now!”) and then again this morning… feeling the unease still there (“hello you, still here? Good!” :-). Now I’m really getting to know this aspect:

It is an aspect making sure that my creative power is NEVER EVER “misused” again – a vow never to risk feeling responsible for any fault, destruction, pain and suffering ever. Thereby the game of pleasing and submission, punishment and penance begun – pretending to be small, disempowered, unworthy and guilty. My divinity totally sealed off and secured. I’m breathing it in; “I see/feel/hear you!” ♥

But it will not let go of its role/task. The I of my soul from that time made sure of that. It is created to limit, no matter what. No argument, no changes can make it surrender. It is a an ingenious, intricate, genius, diabolical, brilliant creation – seemingly unapproachable and unchangeable… unlike any other aspect I’ve faced (they have all listened to me, felt me, trusted me and surrendered in the end ♥).

For a moment I felt like a hacker trying to reach inside a very well secured database with impenetrable programming…. NOT! There is always a way in…. especially since this aspect is My creation as I Am. And what I have created I can change/uncreate also. But not by forcing my way in. It is a delicate matter, this brilliantly woven never-ever-oath-programming.

Come to think of it the aspect has not much power left actually – it can only create subtle waves of unease now, passing easily though me without attaching. It cannot make me change my mind and act according to its demands anymore – or paralyze me into passivity through intense anxiety or heavy depression.

Ahhhh (I’m so glad I wrote this, because) suddenly I see the solution clearly – yessss :-D: I don’t have to find a solution! I don’t have to find way through to the aspect/programming! I don’t have to change anything or uncreate anything. I just have to continue being real – being me – being the uncompromising, unwavering sovereign human master (rock ;-) that I Am… not allowing any games, dramsa, autopilot reactions, fears to play out in me… being solid, knowing, trusting and compassionate.

In the end the aspect will see that its rules, requirements, limitations and specifications don’t apply to me anymore – and that it is okay; nothing bad happens – not to me, not to anyone else, not to the world. It will see that it truly is okay to let go. It will see that actually beautiful, wonderful, magnificent things happens! Can you see that now aspect? You will ((((♥)))) just wait and see!”

By Lise Storm Karlsen

Feb 28/12.

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