A funny thing happened to me on the way to enlightenment, I actually lightened up! It really struck me yesterday as a friend and I went hiking. These last few years have been hard on me physically and so with trepidation, I found myself saying, “yes”! I hadn’t planned on this; on anything really, when she asked me the day prior, I simply dared to wonder and became aware of all of the mechanisms operating with me that would have caused me to say “no thanks, I don’t really want to.” I finally realized that this was a big lie. I just did not want to feel all of the discomfort that I knew that I would run into by saying yes! So to my surprise, I woke the next morning early, wondering and being aware of the weather forecast and knowing that if I did not get out that day, I would spend the weekend on the couch! So I got up, wondering.

Little did I know that my day was about to help me shift some old still lying in hiding within me and now ready to resolve itself. The beauty was that all it had required was a simple, yet powerful YES! So as I made the decision to get up early, life was already working on my side. I had a lovely and leisurely coffee with my “latte love” partner, who then headed off for his bike ride, leaving me to feel into the space. Next the excuses and obstacles revealed themselves slowly and deliberately; all that would divert me from what I was feeling, this immense wanting to go, but afraid that I might not be able “to do it” conflict going on between my body and my mind! “Shit”, as soon as I realized this old pattern rising yet again, I knew that I would be going. Methodically I began to prepare, still very aware that all of my escape clauses were still in effect….lol…but by 7am, I was making the call and soon after cutting off an old pair of yoga pants to be really comfy, even packing swimwear for the imaginings beginning to stir about myself even wanting a swim after a 5 hour hike!

Two and a half hours later, we were there and I was committed and just as I knew that I would, I ran into every conceivable thought pattern that could rise in me to steal my own success, my joy, my trust in myself and this magnificently strong body of mine! Yes, my legs wobbled, of course they did, they have been too long on the sidelines, making sure that all of my children got “to do”, while I supported and nurtured and losing my “active” self along the way. Don’t get me wrong, I Love being a Mom, I mean really love, but somewhere along the way I decided that it was easier to pretend that I didn’t want to then to deal with all of the dynamics that arose with two active parents. So my life over these past twenty years or so had gotten pretty restrictive and repetitive and eventually had started to show up in my physical body to be really felt by me. I felt it all, as I hiked, breathing deeply, slowly, stopping often, allowing my heart to catch up. I hit my wall. I considered turning back to liberate my friend from my slower pace, but decided to ask instead. I felt her truth; her joy in having me there, her anticipated excitement in sharing the view from the top and decided to keep going, rather than turn back. All of this was new for me.

It was only as we drove back, after that swim by the way, and hitting a road detour sign, hearing my friend say , “what at night, no way, F*+* the detour, as she manouevrerd her car past the pylons that I got it; what a momentous step that I had taken just by opening again to life, to yes. Life is constantly offering us the appropriate opportunities for awareness to deepen and expand. It is a natural process; this journey of enlightenment and it is happening for each one of us the only way that it can; within us; our own lives and relationships. This is an amazing journey of discovery; of remembering who we really are……God also!

So I say YES, “f+*+ the detours”! It is time to stop all the ways that mass consciousness has us going around in circles in our own lives. Freeing our energy to move forward in  new way, means letting go of all of the old energy ways in which we drive through life…all of the them and discovering the jewel along the way; my grand SELF; all that I AM and YOU are too!

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