I am tired; no done with all the spiritual rhetoric with no real life sharing. I want to know the HOWS of it, not the whys. I get that it is happening, this shift of unimaginable magnitude; that we humans are going beyond all of our shared experiences to this point in time and that time itself is now collapsing. YUP, I get it. The past, present and future are now all melding into one opportunity to be aware of myself in every choice point. I really do understand and yet it is still happening to me and it feels overwhelming at times. There are times when the fear rises so quickly, one moment going from feeling on top of the world to crashing backwards into some kind of old experience that no longer matches and I simply cannot figure out why it keeps happening. I guess this is it. It keeps happening until I learn how to stop and get off the track, until I become so in tune with myself that I am harmonizing negative energies instantaneously. So far, I have a painful time delay! Actually I suck at knowing within that I am capable, truly capable of owning my own God within. Yup, that pretty much sums it up. To date I am a failed Goddess, but I am not done yet!
26/01/11

LOL…update! DONE…integration 101 is well underway, no longer seeking outside of myself for something “missing”. I know now that I am all that… I AM, the missing parts and the known; the living yin/yang symbol :) Focusing forward now, aware that old feelings are still here, within me, yet choosing to experience something new, willing to create a life that supports me fully, the balanced me; the one who both gives AND receives in equal measure ;) YUP…stepping forward now into the complete unknown…I know more than enough about my limitations!
29/01/13

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